Category Archives: Guest Coloumn

Your Child’s First Step to Confidence & Resilience

IMG_20170504_183821I came across the concept of SoulKids® and felt so exhilarated!

The first time I heard about this unique program was from Shivani, Co-founder of SoulKids® Academy East Coast at an event where we met for the very first time. In those brief moments, Shivani shared with me about the work she does with children and how significant are life-skills in their upbringing.

Her passion and niche had always been to work with children and help them to broaden their mindsets, and this is exactly what she has achieved through her work as a life-skills coach since 2014 at her own academy where she offers coaching and group workshops using the SoulKids® platform, originally founded by Vikas Malkani.

We as adults are aware that most of the issues that we face in life are stemmed from our childhood beliefs. With this in mind, SoulKids® was created, especially for kids, to bring essential life skills to them from a very young age and to inspire them to change the beliefs they carry about themselves and to learn what is possible and what they can potentially achieve.

In today’s busy world, parents are not able to take the time to teach such life skills to their kids. Good news is that these can be taught and children definitely benefit from that additional guidance and respond very well.

Women Lines managed to have a catch up with Shivani and know a bit more about her everyday passion. Shivani is a mom of 2 lovely children 12 & 6, who she jokingly says, still manage to have their little fights and arguments despite a 6-year gap! But what makes her say this in a very calm tone is because this is what she helps others in – parents and children in their attitude and beliefs.

It is pleasure for Women Lines to share what, Shivani has to say about parenting, something she often shares with the parents during her interactions with them-

“Children are our most prized and precious assets!

We as parents, are constantly evolving and learning about our children as well as ourselves from the moment we embark on our parenting journey!

However, as much as being a parent is a paramount feeling of completion, parenting our children through the different phases of their lives can be a challenging and daunting ride, be it an infant, a toddler, a tween, a teen or a young adult!

Along with this continual ride of parenting, we experience countless accomplishments and failures, engage in agreements and conflicts, embrace ups and downs and at times simply give in to circumstances which are a result of external factors out of our control!

Needless to say that not one way of parenting is more superior or perfect than the other. Every parent and his or her family define their own rules and values.

What is important is, to create a strong foundation for your child, which is where the role of life-skills plays a part! The best part is that children can be given that extra support and guidance on such life-skills from as young as 6 years old!”

Shivani offers individual coaching and group life-skills workshops for children aged 6 to 15 years old using the SoulKids® programs of Self-Confidence™, Creative Mind-set™, and SoulKids One-on-One coaching™.

Why SoulKids® One-on-One coaching? How can it support your child?

A highly effective and beneficial tool for children to help them in the emotional, social & intellectual skills is the SoulKids individual coaching for children.

SoulKids® Coaching is a unique process by which, your child receives practical tools that enable them to develop greater self-confidence, enhance their sense of responsibility, become happier, expand their creative thinking, release stress, and expand their mindset and belief systems.

It is a great option to help children deal with:

  • Exam stress and fear
  • Lack of motivation in their academics
  • Not able to identify their unique talents or skills
  • Bullying and rejection at school as well as other situations
  • Peer pressure and dealing with their expectations
  • Image and body issues especially with teens
  • Communication problems with peers, teachers, and family.
  • Separation of parents or other family problems
  • Dealing with sickness or loss of a loved one

Children who have taken up one-on-one coaching, have benefited immensely by overcoming their limitations, anxieties, and fears & blooming into happy and successful individuals. Very convenient as you can mutually work out the day & time of the sessions with your coach. Packages are also available to give your child a continued support channel he/she needs.

Group Life-skills workshops:

Life-skills can be taught in a very fun and engaging manner. Children are trained on life skills not taught in schools such as leadership skills, teamwork, self-confidence, creativity, focus and other positive qualities.

The entire SoulKids® training is geared to raise a child’s level of self-esteem, to see his natural strengths, talents, and abilities and to strengthen his sense of self-belief.

  • Children are taught the importance of:
  • Having a vision, creating goals and then taking action to achieve them.
  • Working together with teams to achieve a goal is encouraged
  • Staying positive during negative events
  • Embracing change with an open mind
  • Never giving up and finish what they started

The result is that children experience an increased sense of self-awareness and self-esteem.

The program is loved by children, who want to keep coming back for more! It is taught by way of stories, games, role-plays and activities and the fun element is at its peak. It helps children step into the world as happy, confident and successful individuals as they are able to relate to the wisdom and life lessons very well.

To know more or sign-up your child connect with Shivani at +6581808094. Check out parent reviews and their schedule for May 2017 at




The Fabulous World of Reiki!

Womenlines is grateful to Ms Pamposh Dhar for guest write up about her experience in field of Reiki-


Sometimes when you least expect it, something utterly fabulous slips quietly into your life. This is how Reiki entered my world. My mother was very ill and someone offered to do “distance Reiki” – no-one in my family had any idea what it was, but Mum said she would like to try it. That was my introduction to Reiki – something I didn’t know about and didn’t believe in; just something Mum had agreed to try out.


But then, a week later, Mum was fully healed! Her doctors had no explanation for it and I began to wonder if there really was something to this “Reiki thing.” I know now that Reiki is a wonderful, positive energy that helps physical and emotional healing, brings mental clarity, and supports spiritual growth.


The Japanese word “Reiki” means universal life-force energy. “Ki” is the equivalent of prana in Sanskrit or qi (pronounced chi) in Chinese. It is the pure energy that pervades the universe – it is not the energy of the Reiki “giver,” as many people seem to think. The Reiki practitioner is merely a channel for universal energy.


There are two ways of doing Reiki – hands on and distance. In hands-on Reiki, the practitioner gently places his or her hands on different parts of the body and uses intention and focus to channel the energy there. The person receiving Reiki may feel powerful energy moving within them or they may just feel very subtle energy shifts. Each person experiences it differently.


In distance Reiki, the Reiki practitioner uses focus and intention to channel the energy to the recipient wherever they may be in the world. One of the most wonderful experiences I have had as a Reiki practitioner was doing distance healing for a 19-month-old boy who had fallen head first onto a concrete surface from a 2nd floor balcony. I met the boy’s aunt in the Philippines just after the boy was admitted to the intensive care unit (ICU) of a hospital in the United States. That night I did several bouts of Reiki for him.


In the morning I received an email from the boy’s aunt. “Somehow something amazing must have occurred last night/today because Anthony is now out of the ICU,” she wrote. “The doctors are really amazed at his recovery – it is completely beyond their expectations. He is now on the pediatric floor instead of the ICU, and will make a full recovery with time.”


Reiki is done not only to heal from illness or injury, but also for overcoming emotional hurt or supporting one’s growth as an individual. In addition, it works very quickly to release stress or relieve depression.


Reiki was established in the early part of the 20th century by Dr. Mikao Usui of Japan. Traditionally, there are three levels of Reiki learning in the Usui system: the first level enables you to do hands-on healing, the second to do distance Reiki and a Reiki Master is qualified to teach as well as practise Reiki.



Pamposh Dhar

Pamposh Dhar is a Reiki Master, meditation teacher and counsellor. She runs the Terataii wellness centre in Singapore. Visit the website: or the Facebook page:



My Reiki journey –

Universal energy –


Experience of motherhood!

Womenlines wants to share this article on parenting by Pooja Kawatra Gupta with its readers. Pooja is a mother who is enjoying her motherhood period by sharing her experiences with a group(she has formed on orkut) of other mothers(1000 mothers approx) on orkut. Here goes the story-

The day Aayan was born we knew that we both have come a long way from just being good friend, as a lover, as a husband & wife and now as a parent .He has given the new meaning to our life.. we realize that as a first time parent there were lot of things which we will be learning everyday .

Just reminded me that ” Kids are teachers and we are student”

Every new day comes as a beautiful moment to cherish for the life long. The day when you saw your baby in scan reports, when baby took the shape, his tiny little hands & feet, his heartbeat and every time your heart beat you think for a moment is it my heartbeat or my baby..Then you just smile back and say he is my heartbeat .That’s one in a lifetime when you have two heartbeat ..

When you hold your baby for the first time and keep remembering many of his first few and the day he says Papa & Mumma..You are at top of this world ..!! Aren’t we waited for this long to hear these beautiful words .

We know that with every new generation parents wants to give best to their baby .Trust me it not only babies have change over a period of time , parenting has gone under huge change. In today’s world it’s not just mother who is taking are of babies at home.. Fathers are equally involved in all the activities..right from the doctors visit at Gynaecologist to vaccination for Baby, which definitely gives mothers sometime for themselves.

Though with raising your baby, parents hardly get anytime for themselves but believe me raising your baby together not only give your baby but yourselves a lifelong security and comfort that both yes we were always there with our kids in each and every step he took in his growing years.

I still remember the time when I was expecting as been a working mother & staying far away from our parents, a first time parents we had enough of queries in our mind.. Why my baby is crying, is he hungry , not well, is there anything which I am unable to understand and so on..
So, my this first hand experience with raising my little son Aayan gave me the inspiration to start a platform where not only we all mums come together to help and resolve each other queries but to become friends for a lifetime. This is when I started a community : Mums & Babies ,we are close to 1,000 mums.. today with love & support of all wonderful mums, who have come long way to share their valuable experience, the best of the tips.. Our little wonders have got friends as well..

If you are a new Mom then join her community to share the warmth and happiness of one big family……

Fine motor skills in Kids!

Womenlines welcomes Rupali Sarkhel Desai as a guest writer and is sharing her write-up about ‘Fine Motor Skills in Kids’ with its readers! 

Twiddling your Thumbs as a toddler can take you far in life! 

My recent experience with a bunch of kids at my creative workshop led me to write this article on ‘Fine Motor Skills’. The workshop also made me realize the stark gender differences between children. One major realization was that girls are much faster than boys when it came to finishing their artwork/tasks. (already proven fact!)  It’s very easy to make sweeping statements like ‘boys are not interested in artwork as much as girls are.’  ‘Boys are too lazy’ ‘Boys are interested in more physical activity compared to girls’ not being too convinced by these stereotypes, I decided to dig deeper.


It was very easy to understand one simple fact – girls were able to somehow fold paper very well (we did origami @ the workshop). Boys took twice as much time to do the same. The very basics of  origami – which meant folding paper, led them to delay at every other stage, which led them to be disinterested eventually in the ‘artwork’ It was very easy to discern the fact that the development of fine motor skills is so crucial and weaknesses of the same can eventually affect a child’s self esteem. Come to think of this, one of the student’s mother also mentioned to me that her son is slow in writing but exceptionally quick in reading!!!   

What is Fine Motor Skills? (FMS) 

FMS involves the small muscles of the body that enable such functions such as writing, grasping small objects and fastening clothing. FMS involves strength, fine motor control and dexterity. (1) FMS can be defined as small muscle movements those that occur in the finger, in co-ordination with the eyes. (2) Lack of the same, can affect a child’s ability to eat, write, fold paper, wear clothes, etc. Which can eventually affect his self-esteem? 

If you have already recognized that your child could be lacking in this area, you need not worry. These skills can be developed with the right kind of activities over a period of time, love and acceptance, and loads of patience. Following are some practical ways to develop the same:- 

1)   ‘Grasping in the mind’ – Let the concept of ‘writing’ fit into your child’s mind through his hands. Best way to do that is simply showing him how to write in the air. Can start with writing alphabets in the air. (for toddlers you can start with shapes, and for little bigger kids you can follow it up with short words). Also this can be turned into a fun play by taking it a step further. Writing in your child’s palm/hand/back can not only be fun at the same time quite interesting. Next you should now encourage your child to do the same to you! This activity will help to trace his fingers. Finger tracing is crucial step to writing. Kids can do this even on textured surfaces like sand, mud, etc. Give them a plate full of rice and let them draw alphabets on them!

2)   Puffed rice (toddlers)- A very easy way to develop the ‘pincer grasp’ is to give puffed rice, titbits, cereals, etc in a bowl as a daily/weekly activity to your toddler/child. This helps to pick up small objects using your thumb and forefinger thereby using the smaller muscles in the fingers.

3)   Exercise – Simple exercise like opening and closing of palm, moving your fingers – playing abracadabra , moving each finger at a time, playing inchworms etc. Also playing regularly with the ball – fetch and throw helps a lot to build up those small muscles. Twiddling your thumbs with your toddler can go a long way in his FMS development 😉

4)   Look out for toys/activities which claim to help in eye-hand co-ordination.

5)   Drawing /painting – Finger-painting is an excellent and fun way to work on the small finger muscles, which help in FMS. Fine tracing also can be introduced. All you need is a pencil, a book with good pictures and a tracing paper. Teach your child to trace objects from a book/magazine etc. This not only helps in learning to draw also helps to develop FMS. Spray painting with a toothbrush also is extremely effective. Try taking print-outs of template and cutting it out and spray painting on it. Can be fun activity. Lots of templates are available on the net. You can try for ex – This site has lots of templates of animals, cartoons, etc. Watch out for totally fun and crafty ideas !

6)   Placing and pasting activities –  place variety of forms eg blocks, felt, paper, string, yarn, cereal, cotton on outlines. Also you can encourage your child to match shapes, color, pictures to a page and paste them within the outlines.

7)   Dough/clay play – let your child squeeze, knead, pat, roll out dough. If you have moulds then it gets even more interesting for your child to try different veggies, food items, etc. A plastic toy knife can be more helpful to cut the dough (with adult supervision). A dough kit I have at home also has a mini extruder which helps to make spaghetti. My lil one finds this the most interesting of all.

8)   Everyday activities – this would include

  • 1. Buttoning shirts,
  • 2. Zipping pants, bags,
  • 3. Locking and unlocking door knobs,
  • 4. Tying and untying ropes, strings etc, tying shoe laces,
  • 5. Manipulating coins different sizes – piggy bank activity.
  • 6. Opening and closing lids of jars,
  • 7. Sweeping, washing dishes,
  • 8. Trying to use spoon, fork, chopsticks while eating their favourite maggie can also go a long way.
  • 9. Pinching bubble wrap between fingers…
  • 10.Playing the piano
  • 11. Playing with a squeeze/stress ball!
  • 12. Bead making, punching holes in paper and connecting them with yarn.

DOING ANYTHING THAT REQUIRES SPECIFIC FINGER MOVEMENTS. Get your child to be more involved in housework, indirectly you will help him in developing FMS!

9)   Typing – is also an excellent way to develop FMS for older kids…. so handover your laptop for a while, mums! Don’t we teach our children always to share their toys? It’s time to share ours 😉


Resources A very important guideline to parents is to make the right kind of resources available to the child. The quality of resources can make a real difference in the actual learning ability of a child too. Bad/sad/cheap quality of colour pencils/crayons/sketch pens etc can make the child disinterested in creative activities sooner than you think. Variety is also equally important.             

 Vertical chalkboards; easels for painting; flannel boards; lite bright; magnet boards (or fridge); windows and mirrors; white boards, etc. Kids can also make sticker pictures; do rubber ink-stamping; use reusable vinyl stickers to make pictures; complete puzzles with thick knobs; use magna-doodle and etch-a-sketch as well. The benefits for these include: having the child’s wrist positioned to develop good thumb movements; they help develop good fine motor muscles; the child is using the arm and shoulder muscles.

There are occupational therapists who also help to do the same, incase you think your child could do some good with extra help. 

With time, patience, positive assurance and encouragement your child will be on his way to grasp Fine Motor Skills!!!

Rupali Sarkhel Desai

Women and their Brands!

While I have been spending the last 2 weeks of December 2009 just relaxing and spending time with my family, especially my little girl, I have witnessed the frenzy of Christmas shoppers in both the cities of Singapore and Malaysia – the two cities I am currently based in.

I work with a lot of women in my field of training in Personal Image and Empowerment and I have discovered that many women are very concerned about their appearances and how they can beautify themselves better.

This leads me to the topic on personal brands and labels. Whether we like or not we are constantly judging people by their looks on the outside. We have been guilty of branding others based on education, looks, weight, “perceived intelligence”, colour of the skin, colour of their hair, height, wealth, culture, who we marry, the bags we carry etc etc. We are constantly branding others and in turn are branded branded branded.

Companies who sell consumer products know just how to tap this emotion of insecurity to further promote their products.

Women I work with in my training are concerned about what others think of them especially how they look like. Often they are unhappy when others misjudge them based on their outer appearance and want to know how to make themselves appear “IN”. Male prisoners I work with also have an insecurity issue about how society will brand them after they leave prison. They want to know how to fit in, how to re-brand themselves away from their criminal past and how to be accepted. Executives and CEOS that I work with also want to learn how to make themselves look more trustworthy, approachable yet representable of their position and to basically learn how to fit in better with their group.

Basically this is represents human behaviour and in today’s highly society, people are getting even more concerned with how they are perceived by others. From my experience, women particularly are more concerned about their image and how others in the society see them. Again, whether we like it or not, we are always branded by others. My take on this? Brand yourself first before others brand you…and do not allow yourself to be branded by what material things you have or wear.

So how do you brand yourself and what should your brand be? Well, the vision is YOURS.

1. First of all, what is the industry that you want to brand yourself in when it comes to your career? When you stay in an a certain industry, people will remember you as the person who bakes cakes, or the entrepreneur mom, or the lady who organises events, etc. You want to be remembered as someone people can associate with a particular industry. The danger of people who moves around too much across industries often is when people cannot associate her as someone committed in her career…and that would be her “brand” !

2. Who is your target audience? Who are you basically branding yourself for? Is it for your work? For your customers? Friends? How do you want yourself to be perceived by them? Always remember that your audience will remember you based on the first time you presented yourself to them so be yourself, be honest and be comfortable. Often people are not themselves the first time they meet new people that they get comments like, “you know, the first time we met you we thought you were…….., but now, wow! You’re not at all like that..” It sounds like a praise, but really, it is a message that what we project may not be who we really are. This can go against you in the future when you are in a job interview, meeting new people or presenting for the first time to a group of potential clients.

3. Which of your personality traits and passions will resonate with your target audience? Similarities always make people feel closer together so highlight the similarities whether in the language and “slang” you use, or clothes that you wear. However, always keep in mind to be yourself. Do not put on a fake accent your lie about your background. A person does not have to learn lie detection skills to feel a fake.

4. What is the most important skill the target audience should know about? When you can relay this message through your work, through promoting your brand to others, this skill will remain in the minds of your target audience.

5. What makes you credible? Integrity, responsibility, commitment are values that people will remember you by. A strong personal brand is when a person hears your name or sees you, a certain positive feeling or thought comes into play. This feeling or emotion that others feel about you is that brand that you carry. Remember, whatever comes out of your actions, your mouth, your thoughts and reactions creates this brand called “YOU”. If you constantly say things that are not reflected in your actions or the results that you show constantly, your brand becomes “untrustworthy”.

How do create reinforce your brand through your demeanour ?

1. Dress according to how you want to be perceived

2. Always take care of your personal hygiene. Often times, people dress well and say all the right things but the two major deal breakers are bad breath and body odour. Somehow these overtake a person’s good personal brand.

3. Do you look rested ? Women have this advantage with makeup to camouflage tired looking eyes J

4. What you wear everyday also affects your brand

5. What comes out of your mouth when you speak

6. Who do you surround yourself with constantly

In this new year, many resolve to make positive changes with their lives – some of these resolutions could be to re brand or reinvent themselves. You can create your change. However, be aware of that perhaps the people who do not support your change or trust your change mostly come from family members who claim they know you better. I believe that only you know yourself better and the best way is to present the real you to others and not be someone you are not just to please others.

I wish you all the best in this NEW YEAR ! May all your New Year resolutions come true faster than you expect. I know one of my resolutions include to brand others less and work on myself more. With Love & Respect,

Murshidah Said

M &Z Empowerment Centre in KL and Singapore

Founder and Director

A Call for awareness and education on the silent and distressing disease-Endometriosis!

Its not Life threatening, BUT its definitely “Quality of Life” Threatening Condition!

Most people know endometriosis as a condition that can cause infertility, but the commonest symptom is pain. Pain with periods, pain with sex, pain opening their bowels, or pelvic pain on most days of the month. Many women with endometriosis become pregnant easily.

Endometriosis is common, but because many women don’t talk about their symptoms, we often don’t realise that it affects between 1 in 10 and 1 in 20 women. For many years, endometriosis was thought to be an uncommon condition of women in their 30s and 40s. We now know that it is a common condition of women in their teens and 20s.

The lining of the uterus is called endometrium. This is the tissue that grows each month and bleeds away during a period. When tissue like endometrium is found outside the uterus it is called endometriosis.

How is endometriosis diagnosed?

The only reliable way to diagnose endometriosis is by laparoscopy. This is an operation where a telescope is inserted through the umbilicus (belly button) to view the organs inside the pelvis. Endometriosis lesions can be clear, pink, red, brown or black.

An ultrasound examination is usually normal unless there are large cysts of endometriosis in the ovaries. These are called endometriomas or chocolate cysts. So, even if an ultrasound is normal, endometriosis can still be present.

What sort of problems can endometriosis cause?

Endometriosis presents in many ways. Common presentations include:

  1. Women with no pain, who are found to have endometriosis during investigation for infertility.
  2. Women who have severe period pain, often from their teenage years, but are well at other times of the month. Pain with periods is called dysmenorrhoea.
  3. Women who have a mix of pain symptoms on most days of the month. This is called chronic pelvic pain. They may have a variety of symptoms including sharp or stabbing pains, changes in bladder function or changes in bowel function.

How is endometriosis managed?

Each woman with endometriosis is different, so the best treatment for each woman will depend on what type of problems she has.

In couples who are unable to become pregnant:

  • It is important to get a full picture of all the possible contributing factors. This includes testing her husbands’ semen. Endometriosis may be only one of the fertility problems present.
  • A laparoscopy to remove the endometriosis may be enough to improve her fertility
  • If pregnancy does not occur after this, then invitro fertilisation (IVF) may be necessary

In women with painful periods, but who are otherwise well the pain may be from the uterus, from endometriosis lesions in the pelvis or from both these areas:

  • It is best to first try medications such as anti-inflammatories (e.g. ibuprofen, naproxen, diclofenac), because not all women with painful periods have endometriosis. The medications should be taken early in the period and continued regularly until the pain resolves.
  • If no better, then the oral contraceptive pill or acupuncture may be helpful
  • If no better, then a laparoscopy with excision (cutting out) of any endometriosis should be considered.
  • Sometimes a device called a mirena iucd is used. This is a way of putting progestogen medication inside the uterus and is often very helpful at making periods light and less painful

In women with chronic pelvic pain, treatment is more complicated. Often there are many different symptoms, so no single treatment will fix all her problems. It is often helpful to write down each symptom and plan treatment for each one:

  • Period pain over several days (rather than just 1-2 days), pain opening bowels with periods, and endometriomas are best managed with high quality laparoscopic surgery. This can be very difficult surgery and it is important that the surgeon involved has extensive experience with laparoscopic surgical excision. Other alternatives include norethisterone tablets taken daily to avoid periods or a mirena iucd.
  • Sharp, stabbing pains, increased sensitivity in the abdomen, soreness near the opening of the vagina, sharp pains that wake her at night, and some types of pain with intercourse are often due to a change in the way nerves in the pelvis function. This is called neuropathic pain. It responds best to medications such as amitriptyline or gabapentin in very low dose. It will also be worse if she is overtired or overstressed.
  • Bladder symptoms of frequency (going to toilet more often), nocturia (getting up at night), urgency (needing to rush to the toilet) and some types of pain with intercourse may be due to a condition called interstitial cystitis. It is common in women with endometriosis and needs a special type of test called a cystoscopy and hydrodistension to diagnose. Useful information can be found at
  • Bowel changes such as constipation, diarrhoea and pelvic discomfort sometimes improve with surgery, but are often due to food intolerances or an irritable bowel.
  • Pelvic pain which is worse in different positions or with different activities and some types of pain with intercourse is often due to spasm of the pelvic floor muscles. The muscles just inside the vagina are tight and pressure on them causes pain. Treatment options include pelvic floor physiotherapy, botox injections in the pelvic floor muscles to relieve the spasm, and sometimes low doses of amitriptyline.

Many women with chronic pelvic pain also suffer tiredness and may feel generally unwell. Even when their symptoms improve, they require a lot of emotional support from their family and friends to return to an active and healthy life.

Written by; -Dr Susan Evans is a Pelvic & Laproscopic Surgeon & author of ‘Endometriosis and other pelvic pain’ written for women with endometriosis. It is available from her website:

She is also the co-founder of the Asia Pacific Endometriosis Alliance & co-founder of Australian Endometriosis Centre, Adelaide Branch.

Her books will be available in Singapore in the World Women Health 2009, November 28th 2-6pm. Suntec City – Rooms303-306.

Registration details at

Shopping and Women

Shakun Narang wants to share this interesting information with womenlines readers-

According to the findings of the most recent poll, it takes women almost one year of their lives to decide what to wear. Picking outfits for work, dating, gym, dinner parties, holidays and many other activities means that the average woman will be spending about 287 days rifling through her closet.girl-shopping

The survey, carried out by the UK clothes giant Matalan, was based on an adult lifetime and compiled the results after polling nearly 2,500 women with the ages between 16 and 60 years. The results revealed that most women will be spending approximately 16 minutes on weekday mornings and 14 minutes on a Saturday or Sunday mornings selecting the correct ensembles to wear. According to the study authors, women spend an average of twenty minutes when deciding what to wear on a Friday or Saturday nights and the same amount of time is needed for an outfit selection during a week night.

The researchers behind the study also found that women spend about 52 minutes in front of their closet when it comes to choosing clothes for a vacation at sea. While on vacation, ten minutes a morning will be taken up when a lady is trying to find an acceptable outfit, with another 10 minutes spent on selecting clothes for the evening. In addition to that, dinner parties, Christmas parties and black tie occasions – at approximately 36 minutes a time 6 times throughout a year – adds up to three and a half days.

The results of the poll also demonstrate that, on average, most of women will try on two different outfits every single morning before making up their mind and coming to a final decision. In addition, one in every two women spend about 15 minutes the night before work trying to figure out what clothes to select. Among other findings of the survey is that about 64 hours per year women spend on talking about clothes to their female counterparts.

Sarah Gilmore, a spokesman for Matalan, said that what a woman wears is directly linked to how she feels about herself and it is very important a woman feels exceptional in what she wears. “Whatever the occasion your clothes portray an image and we understand this is fundamentally important to women,” Gilmore said.

The Art of Remembering and Interpreting Dreams

Shakun Narang wants to share this interesting article with womenlines readers-

At different times in my life, I am a physician, a teacher, a friend and an author, but being a dreamer is what I value the most.

World of Dreams

World of Dreams

Whatever I am doing, I always hear my dreams echoing in a distant underground chamber beneath my thoughts and feelings, attuned to the rhythms of my body and the very substance of the earth. They are my compass and my truth; they guide me and link me to the Divine. They call out to me in an intimate whisper, always knowing how to find me. They speak my real name.

For me, dreaming is a direct line to a place where magic abounds and nothing is without meaning. It is a pristine state of awareness, unpolluted and clear. Direct guidance for healing lies in our dreams, the natural territory of intuition. Here, time and space are non-existent and anything is possible. Like a blank, white canvas, our dream world is a spacious medium where intuition can freely express itself. We have only to listen.

You are in partnership with your dreams. Initiate an ongoing dialogue with them. It’s like consulting the wisest doctor you can imagine who knows you inside out. You can ask your dreams anything. No question is trivial if it is meaningful to you. Expect answers. Some will be direct. Others may require interpretation.

Your dreams can reveal many truths about your life. They can provide extraordinary intuitive insights, and give you information that can help your health, love life and career. You’d be surprised at the straightforward advice that your dreams give, either spontaneously or on request.

Dreams can keep you well. Dreams provide answers. But first you must retrieve them. Here are my four strategies to help you remember your dreams:

  • Keep a journal and pen by your bed.
  • Write a question on a piece of paper before you go to sleep. Formalize your request. Place it on a table beside your bed or under your pillow.
  • In the morning do not wake up too fast. Stay under the covers for at least a few minutes remembering your dream. Luxuriate in a peaceful feeling between sleep and waking, what scientists call the hypnagogic state. Those initial moments provide a doorway.
  • Open your eyes. Write down your dream immediately; otherwise it will evaporate. You may recall a face, object, color, or scenario, feel an emotion. It doesn’t matter if it makes perfect sense-or if you retrieve a single image or many. Record everything you remember.

When you’re finished, refocus on the question you asked the previous night. See how your dream applies. One, two, or more impressions about the who/what/where of your solution may have surfaced. Get in the habit of recording your dreams regularly. Be assured I’ve never met anyone who can’t be taught how to remember. Keep at it. Remember to practice. Soon it will become second nature to you!

In addition to the practical aspects of remembering dreams, there’s an intuitive level to understanding dreams. Reliable intuitive information stands out in very specific ways. Watch for these clues:

  • Statements that simply convey information
  • Neutral segments that evoke or convey no emotion
  • A detached feeling, like you’re a witness watching a scene
  • A voice or person counseling you, as if you’re taking dictation from an outside source
  • Conversations with people you never met before who give instructions.

I’ve found that my most dead-on intuitions either come across as compassionate or have no emotion at all. Develop a careful eye as you practice separating the content of your dreams from your reactions to it. Soon you’ll be able to tell the difference between unreliable guidance and truly reliable guidance.

Be aware that your dreams go by different rules than your waking life. Get ready for a mind shift. Physical laws no longer apply. Gravity changes. In dreams you can fly!

© Judith Orloff, M.D., 2007

This article was adapted from “Guide to Intuitive Healing” by Dr. Judith Orloff, M.D.

It’s Tough Being a Woman.. Or is it??

If there is the most colourful rainbow in the world, it would be a woman..

If there is the most complicated machine in the world, we can call it “Her”

For no oceans depth can match that of a woman’s heart with all its hidden chest of Joy, Happiness, Pain and Sorrow…

I can’t speak for other women, but I do for one, Me..

I may carry a flag that resonates with some and may create factions who would turn against me..

I am afterall a woman with my own mind..

I don’t apologize for being me, neither do I feel regret for my past imperfections

I’ve learnt to defend myself not through the art of Martial defence, but through the art of building a wall around me to keep myself safe within, away from the harsh bombardments of words that know no glimmer of truth to what lies within me..

But alas, how long do I have to stand hiding behind those walls?

The time has come, and I have seen those walls crumble like the Berlin walls, a history within my own world, the day the walls crumble, the day I allow myself to feel, whatever it may be..

To allow the rain drops to fall on my face, to allow the sun to burn my skin, to allow the winds to blow my body as I stand firm holding on to my invisible poles of faith and courage within

I fear none for you and me, we are the same, spiritual beings trapped in a physical form…

I have only reverence for my Creator, to whom I weep and cry my hearts woes.. and to whom I raise my gratitude to…

I have no fear to face the world, no more. Enough of these walls and this iron image..

Enough of running and hiding from the harsh realities that crumbles this frail heart…

I choose to Love openly and with that I take the risk of being hurt, humiliated or ridiculed for my Voice..

It’s the risk that makes me human, to feel, to err, to forgive and let go,to heal and grow ..

Who are you to tell me what I am made of..

Who are you to tell what I ought to feel

Who are you to define happiness or success…

You will never know, how this caterpillar fought in that cocoon to find its way out to fly not for its own freedom, but flying daily to seek out each flower to flower and on its journey, pollinates and creates a new evolution…

That every flap of this wing no matter how insignificant does carry its weight that can even change the course of the weather and life itself…

Oh, but how can I blame you, for you see with those pair of eyes through your filtered lenses…

I can be the ant or the queen, or the butterfly or the lioness hunting, or a mere fly … but I have meaning, purpose and existence to what I do no matter how insignificant..

Success isn’t defined by my occupation in life, who cares if I am a housewife, an office lady with the high heels in the high flying job or a janitor or a president…who cares…

Success is just is, within my realm and domain of what I choose to be best at my playing field..

I celebrate my success and other women’s success wherever and whatever you do, in the best intentions, ….To you my women friends, those I know or don’t , I know and you know, we do what We Can the Best way we Know how, at the Best Resources we have at that moment in time, therefore we are a successful in our own rights, always in continuous pursuit for the higher good of our own self and those around us…

Live in my shoes for a day and you will know the meaning of my life, and until then your opinions remains at best your own reality…for your thoughts of me doesn’t create my reality…

For it does only if I permits it to be…

Yes I am hurt, coz I am aware that I choose to entertain your words to hurt me, for there is no way yours or anyone’s words can hurt me unless I allow it to …

I am aware and that I have a best friend in me, keeping me in check, this awareness I have within me, keeps me alert and filters off, your opinions your judgments and labels on me…

Your words came to me, for a moment of lapse, I felt the hurt, but that’s about it..For I risk this openness and authenticity of being me in the open thus I am aware of the risks of being looked at with your magnifying glasses…

Just as the tick of the seconds on the clock, that’s it. It stops there, I choose to stop your words from eating me up…It stops there…

I choose to love myself more than I choose to allow you words to stay and rot in me..

I choose to keep the weeds off my garden, and allow only the best seed of thoughts to come through me…

It’s tough being a woman, only if I allow it to be so…

I choose ease and grace of forgiveness..

My iron walls are only used to stop your realities from infiltrating mine….the rest I challenge with compassion of loving myself above all else Such that no matter what, I know who I am, my purpose, Intentions and contributions …

To you I may be the lousiest woman on earth, your standards…

To me relative to my own, I am my own best.. at most I have my best potentials within and every day I live, I live to inch forward towards realizing that fullest potentials in me to be the best I can be in all areas of my life…my kids, my family, my career, my life…

I may not be perfect in my acts, but I know my soul is Perfect, for my Creator, is Your Creator who has perfected our souls to be the Best of Him Creations…

Lies within me are Potentials.. and Lies before me are Resources..that I will use to my very best daily, in the capacity I can to Be the Best I can be, compared to you?? No Not you… compared to me based on my own beliefs about my own Soul’s potentials…

I will continue to fly and flap my wings and create my butterfly effects that will change the course of the winds… for every flap of my wings create a meaning, purpose and contributions beyond measure in my own ways…

I’ve said my Peace, thus I rest my Case of the Conversation of a Woman Vs Her Inner Voice


Writer is a Mom of 2, Nutritionist, Entrepreneur & Life Adventurer who is MADLY & Passionately in LOVE with Speaking & Writing to Lift the Spirit and Inspire the Soul..
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Idiot box, Moms & Daughters

Garima Pant from India wants to share her views about effect of TV culture on youngsters with womenlines readers-

I am full of gratitude to my dear friend (who own this platform) for asking me(read challenging…that’s how I feel with all the rusting that corporate job has done) to write something on womanhood or parenting. That was even more challenging…notwithstanding the fact that she and I had passionately created a journal on precisely this during college. Ironically I don’t get time to consciously think about womanhood and parenting I have yet to experience! Nonetheless, all of my friend’s prompting has shaken my writer self and thoughts started bouncing back and forth until this evening I had a chance glimpse of Star Pariwar awards.

Well, I must tell you that I have never been a TV person and of late, having idiot box to watch with dedication is increasingly becoming a challenge with just one TV between two persons (you know what I mean!). In any case, after watching this award programme, I must say that idiot box is not all that idiotic when it comes to fostering cultural stereotypes which are valued as integral virtues of Indian family set up. No matter what, you can neither deny that cultural stereotypes do play a role in identifying on ethics society one belongs. Now the Star Award category list was interesting with ‘Best beta’, ‘Best beti’ and so on. Even more interesting were the clips shown for each nominations – as Indian as it could get! Would you still say that TV is spoiling the GenNext kids?? Not me… After catching glimpses of this extravaganza, I immediately recalled and recoiled to my trail of thoughts that had been lingering on since my very recent trip to Uttrakhand.

I had met my cousin there after a couple of years and she has almost completed her Company Secretary course and is contemplating a move to Delhi from Haridwar for an internship in a renowned MNC. She is an avid couch potato…that is another significant shift from the time I was a teen – girls (I am more thinking about them) are so particular and careful about what soaps they like and must watch. Unlike most girls of her age, her wardrobe is full of pretty salwar-kameez dresses, each one with its own story of creation. When I tried to offer buying her a dress, I was amazed how particular she was about what color combination, fabric and look she wanted for the very next dress she had to buy (a mehandi green-maroon mangalgiri cotton with wide brocade). I was reminded of my days when I would have just six pairs of dresses that mom bought to last entire college years. That’s what I mean when I say idiot box isn’t all that idiot! Youngsters know what they want. While discussing about her future, while she had ambitious plans about career, she believed an arranged marriage is better that that of one’s choice…that is also what she imbibed from her favorite soaps on TV! If she could potentially represent her generation to any extent then I can make another interesting revelation. Their flights of fantasies about encountering ‘prince charming’ could be something ever-green and romantic like the scarf getting carried away with a breeze to someone’s arms. Wish I too qualified for one such fancy…So I would rather believe that diverse genre of teleseries ranging from family soaps and reality shows are doing some good (let us look at glass as half-full) in shaping young minds.

That was on girls. I also feel that now moms have become so much more open, appreciative and ambitious about their daughters. Mothers, I believe have always seen the reflection of their unfulfilled or cherished dreams and desires in their girls but probably never felt they could do anything about it more than getting them the best possible match until recent times. With soaps like ‘Radha ki beti…’ and ‘Utran’ moms don’t seem to be missing the glory that having a son used to bring. Not only do they seem friends with daughter, they are anxious to see their girls bring laurels to them by excelling on career front. Moms are lending daughters their ear, experience and faith by having hearty chats and mature discussions – something that was pretty amiss in my time. My aunt (my cousin’s mom) knows for sure how her prospective son-in-law has to be. In lieu, moms are also enjoying more liberated and evolved company for themselves. My relations with my mom were quite formal and we hardly ever indulged in banters, at least not between just two of us. Not that my mom did not have dreams for me or would not have wanted to be different with me but then idiot box had not evolved so much. Nonetheless, my mom too is an avid couch potato and I am assuming the goodness of idiot box will flow unto me no matter a little late.

Garima Pant