Get to know how those who trigger us can be our best teachers for our personal growth. Powerful sharing by Leadership Coach Sally Anderson, a guest influencer for Leadership at Womenlines panel from New Zealand. Sally has privately coached key influencers internationally: CEO’s/executive teams/C-Suite forums/entrepreneurs/celebrities/politicians/millionaires/billionaires over 20 years.
Love today’s topic. Felt it was apt to speak into this today in light of what is happening in the world. Personal and professional relationships are being impacted now more than ever so to learn this skill would be highly recommended. What skill am I referring to? The ability to learn from those who trigger us as our biggest teachers, and knowing how to de trigger such that you are no longer impacted by external circumstance or people! The ability to remain equanimous at these times, ’hands-down is a priceless value proposition.
So what are we triggered by as humans? The Gottman Institute, a relationship based integrative research company in the USA framed the top 24 triggers as follows:- I felt excluded/I felt powerless/I felt unheard/I felt scolded/I felt judged/ I felt blamed/I felt disrespected/I felt lack of affection/I felt lonely/I felt ignored/I felt I couldn’t be honest/ I felt light the bad guy/gal/I felt forgotten/abandoned/I felt unsafe/I felt unloved/I felt it was unfair/I felt frustrated/I felt disconnected/I felt trapped/I felt lack of passion/I felt uncared for/I felt manipulated/I felt controlled
I would add:
I felt overlooked/I felt undermined/I felt criticised/I felt humiliated/I felt angry/I felt belittled/I felt the other party was being condescending/I felt taken for granted/I felt betrayed/I felt the other party was being insensitive/I felt overwhelmed/I felt disappointed/I felt misunderstood
Being triggered applies in our personal lives as much as in our professional lives for human beings are involved. I wish to provide 2 suggestions today:-
- The benefit of learning that those who trigger us are our biggest teachers – and have a story to demonstrate to provide context
- The top 10 additional benefits I would recommend when triggered
So here goes:-
STORY:
I was based in the Netherland/Boston/New York back in 2001 on an offshore global restructure assignment and I had been away from New Zealand for over a year so when I returned to the company I contracted to there had been a new appointment heading up the Program/Project Directors/Managers – from the minute I returned we did not get on, he triggered me 1000% because I did not believe he had what it took to be in the role and his obvious condescending controlling attitude just landed like a cup of cold sick! SOOOOO, instead of enduring this tension in the office environment for more than I week, I called a meeting with him, to which he was surprised. But wait, it gets better….in the meeting I opened with acknowledging him for being one of my biggest teachers and explained why – I spoke into my observation of him, I spoke into genuinely saying that I had a lot to learn from him (his whole demeanour changed), I spoke into my desire to address any issues we had with each other, and requested that we work TOGETHER to make the business relationship work – needless to say, we became great friends and often reminded each other how when we first met we clashed like bulls at a gate. LEARNING: I know if I had not had this meeting it would have just escalated. By addressing it, applying a bit of reverse psychology we were able to find common ground. I indeed learnt a lot from him for it was my responsibility to take the learning and turn the situation around!
Top 10 Suggestions – What To Do When Triggered
- CHOICE – You have a choice on what you feel, the choice on how you react, the choice on what you do so choose your state wisely for the only person who looses when triggered is the one who is triggered
- KARMA – How you treat me if YOUR Karma, how I react is mine!
- COSTS – Get present to the costs of staying triggered, for if you were present to the costs you would move in a heartbeat
- PAYOFFS – The key to self-mastery if not about not being triggered its about the length of time you spend in the trigger, a minute, an hour, a day, a week, a month, a lifetime, some people go to their graves being triggered – stock standard human ontological payoffs of staying triggered are: You get to be right, you get to make others wrong, you get to be justified about your point of view, you don’t have to be responsible, you get to be a victim feeling powerless to change the situation, you get to dominate, manipulate and control
- LIGHTEN UP – Life is too short to have anything impact your state, get a sense of humour and move on
- DO THE WORK – Get the healing if your trauma wound/s are ruling your life. Get the coaching if you are not able to shift state. Get wellbeing support if it’s impacting your health
- COMPASSION – Judgment = Mastery of Compassion – 1 finger pointing out 3 fingers pointing back – have compassion for those who judge you for what must it be like in their quiet moments to project their dysfunction onto you? The more someone judges you the more you can learn the art of ‘Mastering Compassion’
- MEANING – ALL of the human sufferings is a function of what you make things mean, if you do not wish to suffer stop feeding past and future meaning-based projections, it’s just ludicrous, you are the only one being impacted
- CLEAN UP – Take responsibility for the part you play in all interactions, clean up, the self-interest is massive to ensure your own equilibrium stays in tacts
- COMMITMENT – If you are committed to living and leading an equanimous life get committed to not allowing anything externally to trigger you, mastering this is priceless
Tolerating a triggered state anything more than 10 minutes is not only not wise, its MAJOR self-sabotage. Stop operating as the child, be the adult and do what it takes to get complete and move on!
Sally Anderson
Leadership Coach To The Influencers
http://linkedin.com/in/sallyanderson-leadershipcoachtotheinfluencers
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Womenlines teams wish very Happy International Women’s Day 2021 to women tribe across the globe! IWD Special segment at Womenlines is bringing to you the best thoughts, quotes, videos, poems, articles that can move you to give yourself a priority.
In this episode, Charu Mehrotra founder of the online magazine Womenlines is sharing a powerful thought shared by Phylicia Rashad!
A very Happy #internationalwomensday2021 to womenfolk across the globe!I want to shout out to all women across to believe in the magic and power of collective intention which we as women can use for self excellence and excellence for our planet too. Let’s get together and believe in the power of working together to achieve our dreams together!
In love with these words by #PhyliciaRashad
“Any time women come together with a collective intention, it’s a powerful thing. Whether it’s sitting down making a quilt, in a kitchen preparing a meal, in a club reading the same book, or around the table playing cards, or planning a birthday party, when women come together with a collective intention, magic happens.” -Phylicia Rashad
Celebrate THE PHENOMENAL WOMAN, that is you on this special day!
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Womenlines takes pleasure to share incredible knowledge shared by Health and Wellness Expert Subah Saraf from the Satvic Movement platform, as an Influencer for Food and Nutrition on the Womenlines panel! Satvic Movement is a non-profit health education platform, formed with an aim to bring man close to Mother Nature. They provide holistic knowledge about health, coming from our Vedas & scriptures. In this must-watch video, Subah has shared a diet plan which can help in curing many diseases.
Want to get rid of diabetes, back pain, knee pain, thyroid, constipation, acne, high blood pressure, PCOD, low energy, obesity, hair fall or even excess weight? Follow the four food principles and one simple diet plan discussed in this video. By changing to living foods, water-rich, plant-based diet, any disease can be reversed!
Subah Saraf
Satvic Movement
The ancient Vedic knowledge shared by the Satvic Movement health education platform is meticulously captured and translated into ‘easily adaptable habits’ for today’s modern lifestyle. They deliver this knowledge to you through our Health Transformation Workshops, YouTube videos and our Food Book. Following the Satvic lifestyle empowers you to become your own doctor. You can live a life of optimal health and automatically cure all chronic diseases you might be suffering from – simply by changing your food & lifestyle.
Let’s come together and save the planet from ever-increasing diseases. Let’s create a Health Movement and follow amazing knowledge shared by Satvic Movement! Womenlines is committed to spreading Satvic Movement’s powerful knowledge related to healthy living across the globe!
Follow and share about Satvic Movement channel to get regular powerful health updates !
Subscribe https://www.womenlines.com to become the best version of self! Womenlines is a weekly online magazine publishing content on Business Excellence, Health, Leadership Skills and listed in top 50 women’s online magazines to follow in 2021!
Womenlines teams wish very Happy International Women’s Day 2021 to women tribe across the globe! IWD Special segment at Womenlines is bringing to you the best thoughts, quotes, videos, poems, articles that can move you to give yourself a priority.
In this episode, Charu Mehrotra founder of the online magazine Womenlines is sharing a powerful thought shared by Instagram page @herupliftingquotes. It says that be the woman you want to be.
First, imagine what you want to be. There are so many examples of women achievers across the globe. It is all about understanding what makes them special. What habits do they follow? How they maintain their resilience. Step by step you can build up yourself the type of woman you want to be. It’s all about awareness, mindfulness and the passion to change self for the better version.
Womenlines Online Magazine
At Womenlines we strongly believe every woman on this planet is blessed with some amazing power which she can only use if empowered with the right mindset and knowledge. We are what we read and eat, therefore we bring to you a powerful weekly magazine to promote excellence in women across the globe so they can be the best version of themselves.
Friends always remember that you have the ‘Power of Choice’ with you. Power of Choice to use your time mindfully, to improve yourself by upskilling yourself, to prioritize yourself, and power of choice to be mindful of what you are thinking, what you are communicating to yourself. Power of choice to stop reading negative news around the media. Once you will start using the power of choice correct way you can fight against any challenge in your life. Check out which tribe of women you are part of.
Gear up to become the woman you want to be. Start fresh in your business or your profession. Have a better understanding of yourself and always compliment yourself the best way. Always remember if you are healthy and happy then only you can take care of your family’s health and happiness. Start educating yourself the best way to lead a healthy and happy life.
Subscribe https://www.womenlines.com to become the best version of self! Womenlines is a weekly online magazine publishing content on Business Excellence, Health, Leadership Skills and listed in top 50 women’s online magazines to follow in 2021!
Womenlines teams wishes very Happy International Women’s Day 2021 to women tribe across the globe!
At Womenlines we strongly believe every woman on this planet is blessed with some amazing power which she can only use if empowered with the right mindset and knowledge. We are what we read and eat, therefore we bring to you a powerful weekly magazine to promote excellence in women across the globe so they can be the best version of themselves.
It is all about getting awareness about excellence in life and applying that knowledge. IWD Special segment at Womenlines is bringing to you the best thoughts, quotes, videos, poems, articles that can move you to give yourself a priority. Friends always remember that you have the ‘Power of Choice’ with you. Power of Choice to use your time mindfully, to improve yourself by upskilling yourself, to prioritize yourself, and power of choice to be mindful of what you are thinking, what you are communicating to yourself. Power of choice to stop reading negative news around the media. Once you will start using the power of choice correct way you can fight against any challenge in your life. Check out which tribe of women you are part of.
Gear up to give yourself a priority this month. Start fresh in your business or your profession. Have a better understanding of yourself and always compliment yourself the best way. Always remember if you are healthy and happy then only you can take care of your family’s health and happiness. Start educating yourself on the best way to lead a healthy and happy life.
Credit for the artwork goes to the Instagram page of Business Rules for Women! Follow them on Instagram for powerful insights for women empowerment.
Womenlines presents a talk show where viewers are learning various ways how to harness the power of gender neutrality in the present world. In Episode 3, a video shared above, understand Gender Role vs Gendered Behaviour in men and women. In this episode, our Gender Neutrality Expert and researcher Rajashri Rajashekhar has brought out interesting research facts to showcase the same. Further, she has also talked about organisational effectiveness with reference to this topic. They have developed an assessment that identifies the gaps in leadership. Organizational and individual level.
Gender Neutrality-Gender Role & Gender Behaviour
Culture plays a significant role in Gender Behaviour Gender Role & Gender Behaviour. They can be two different aspects but cultural influence and norms including the ability to think or limit while playing these roles are influenced by the culture.
Rajashri Rajashekhar is the founder of Poornam Foundation & Researcher of Gender Neutrality. Her journey of 28 years of work experience has added value to her being as an Entrepreneur, Educationist, Researcher, People Person, Writer, Speaker, Counsellor, Trainer and Game Changer.
Poornam Foundation is Rajashri’s passionate venture where she focuses on providing training on Gender Neutrality. She strongly believes we can create Gender Neutral Workplaces, Gender Neutral Mindsets and Gender Neutral Society. She has done detailed research about mindset strategies that have helped people in past and how those solutions can extremely help us in our day to day challenges. Rajahshri emphasises that normally we focus on the physical aspect of the organisation only, but if we also simultaneously work on the mindsets that drive the entire process beyond just business norms and instructions. This can create higher levels of productivity and creativity, leading to strong outcomes.
Visit https://www.poornatva.net/ to know more about Rajshri’s work and contact details!
Subscribe to https://www.womenlines.com to become the best version of self! Womenlines is a weekly online magazine publishing content on Business Excellence, Health, Leadership Skills and listed in top 50 women’s online magazines to follow in 2021!
Womenlines takes pleasure to welcome Nalini Dheer from India as a guest contributor for the ‘Healthy Recipes for Healthy You’ segment of Womenlines. Check out a healthy recipe of Eggless Mango Cake.
Recipe of Mango Cake
Do like Insta Page’I am Oorja‘- for many more healthy recipes which can help you to boost your health!!
Nalini shares a passion for life and loves to express that through food. Nalini has travelled all over India and abroad with her husband who was a doctor in the Indian Army and now retired. Nalini has avidly experienced and learnt the cultures and food across India while travelling across the country as an Army wife. She also recently retired as a kindergarten teacher to enjoy the wonders of being a grandparent!
Nalini is now keen to build a community of like-minded folks with a focus on sumptuous tasty and healthy food through “Oorja”. She would love to share with busy mothers and busy households, the beauty of the dynamic Indian cuisine and western Indian variations. Her endeavour is to make her recipes crisp & concise that is quick to follow and healthy for today’s on the go modern woman.”
Visit – Oorja – https://www.instagram.com/iamoorja/?hl=en
Subscribe https://www.womenlines.com to become the best version of self! Womenlines is a weekly online magazine publishing content on Business Excellence, Health, Leadership Skills and listed in the top 40 women’s online magazines to follow in 2020!
Womenlines takes pleasure to welcome Heleniq Argyrou, known for her incredible work in the field of female leadership, a Peak Performance Strategist who is elevating speakers, leaders and extra visionaries. Heleniq is also a researcher in the field of neuroscience and is from Cyprus. In the interview above Heleniq has shared insightful secrets related to how to be a peak performer!
Heleniq Argyrou
Heleniq Argyrou is an Award-Winning Speaker, Innovator, Conference Founder, Human Behavior, Aha Intelligence and Flow State Expert. An African born Clinical Psychologist and Peak Performance Expert with Cypriot heritage, Heleniq founded Women of Truth Conferencing in Netherlands and Cyprus for entrepreneurs and experts in their awakening and looking to make a greater social impact globally. Focused on Innovation and revolutionary female leadership, Heleniq carries her online and offline teachings with 22 years of research, clinical practice, and numerous collaborations in over 14 countries. She also offers neuroscience based peak performance trainings online for speakers and leaders and anyone wanting greater impact for world change.
Heleniq is experienced as a unique and deeply inspiring individual, accent on the individual. She is an award-winning innovator and forecaster, a true luminary for our times. She stands on the heads of psychological and human behaviour giants to cross the spectrum into leadership and teambuilding. With clients like the European Commission, BMW, Ethicon Products, Vodacom and the United Nations Development Projects to Universities, hospitals and Montessori schools.
Any experienced dancer or driver knows how important it is to keep one eye fixed on the horizon line. As a drummer reaching peak states, she was initially self-trained and later trained by world-renowned percussionists Layne Redmond, Rowan Storm and Master Zohar Fresco, on frame and tambourine and in djembe Arthur Hull teambuilding drum circle methods.
Associates and Accolades
- Exceptional Women of Excellence Award for Women’s Economic Forum speeches and years of service.
- The Strong Institute – Rhythmic Entrainment Interventions for Autism, anxiety and neurological disorders.
- YinAlithea – Cyprus Womens’ Conference, OGEE/ Business Professional Women’s Organisation Limassol, Family Planning Association.
- Ministry of Education Cyprus – invited to facilitate djembe drum workshops for all preschool and primary schools in Cyprus along with Special Needs Institute island-wide.
- Grantee and award winner for United Nations Development Project (Cyprus) ‘One Heartbeat’ peacebuilding project Cyprus.
- Grantee and funding recipient for United Religions Initiative (San Francisco) and its Youth World Conference (India) and project funding for “Rhythm Earth and Us” youth development project at ‘Z’ zones schools.
- Associations with United Religions Initiative (San Francisco); Sri Ramanujah Trust (India) ; Sarah Kline; the Association of Sound therapy, Spain; United Religions Initiative, San Francisco and The Strong Institute, New Mexico; The Ministry of Education, The N.G.O. Support Centre, Cyprus
Womenlines team wishes success to Heleniq Argyrou, for all her future endeavours. Visit Heleniq Argyrou to know more details about her.
Connect with Heleniq on Linkedin at https://www.linkedin.com/in/heleniq!
Subscribe https://www.womenlines.com to become the best version of self! Womenlines is a weekly online magazine publishing content on Business Excellence, Health, Leadership Skills and listed in top 50 women’s online magazines to follow in 2021!
Womenlines takes pleasure to share about Vani Shukla as an Influencer for Yoga at Womenlines. In this episode, Vani is sharing various Asanas of Yoga for sleep time!
Life is getting busier with time and thus people have to look out for various ways so they can sleep well. Yoga expert Vani Shukla is sharing yoga for sleep this month for our busy professionals!
Vani has been into Yoga and Fitness for more than 18 years. She is a post-graduate in Yoga therapy from India. Presently she lives in Adelaide, Australia for the past five years and runs International Yoga Retreats and workshops.
Key Points for yoga for sleep-
1) Yoga for sleep can improve your sleep in three easy steps.
2) Yoga for sleep practices can be done either before sleep or during the day anytime.
3) For better results do yoga for sleep 3-4 times a day..it takes only 10min to do all three practices.
4) Adding alternate breathing practice is a plus in this sequence.
Better sleep improves our productivity, creativity and energy levels, so sleep well and perform well.
You can also follow me for more information at-
Facebook- yogabegins-with Vani
Vani has been into Yoga and Fitness for more than 18years. She is a post-graduate in Yoga therapy from India. She was among the first few female fitness experts in Delhi to qualify American Council on Exercise exam in 2011. Presently she lives in Adelaide Australia for the past five years and runs International Yoga Retreats and workshops.
Visit Yoga Begins With to follow and know more about yoga from Vani!!
Subscribe https://www.womenlines.com to become the best version of self! Womenlines is a weekly online magazine publishing content on Business Excellence, Health, Leadership Skills and listed in top 50 women’s online magazines to follow in 2021!
Womenlines presents a talk show ‘Let’s erase Domestic Violence’.This talk show aims to share various ways to prevent domestic violence from our society across the globe. In this episode, Womenlines takes pleasure to welcome Neeru Mishra a Lawyer from India who is sharing in the above video, very helpful information regarding various ways survivors of Domestic Violence can receive Legal aid in India. Womenlines is also grateful to Archana Mittal, therapist/counselor and Dr Bollineni Keerthi, president Vasavya Mahila Mandali NGO, for their presence and sharing insights to prevent domestic violence.
Neeru Mishra
Neeru Mishra, is an advocate, practising at the High Court of Andhra Pradesh. She hails from the UT of Jammu and Kashmir. Her instinct to work for women empowerment encouraged her to involve herself in the field of law and community development. She did her research on the Rehabilitation of Women Prisoners vis-à-vis their human rights at Central Jail, Jammu while studying Criminology. Besides her professional work as an advocate, she has a strong commitment to social justice and women human rights. She was part of the “Leaders For Change” program organized by Maytree Foundation, Toronto and had been trained as a Leader for Change.
Archana Mittal
Archana Mittal is BE, MBA, Therapist/Counsellor/Social Worker and an Influencer at Womenlines!
Offering my time with empathy and respect to people, I actively listen and help people come in touch with their own feelings and emotions related to their experiences in their life. I use evidence-based therapies of REBT/CARKUFF, to help individuals identify their disturbances, recognise the influence of their own self -defeating beliefs and adopt an alternative healthier way of thinking, which helps them achieve their goals in life, by making their own informed choices. I am a ‘keeper of secrets’ and offer talk-based therapy in total confidentiality. I have been in this field for more than ten years and worked closely with children, adolescents, and adults with diverse backgrounds, with ranges of concerns like anxiety, stress, depression, career-related concerns, relationship issues, violence and other mental health-related concerns. My payoff is seeing my clients leading a better quality of life, developing meaning relationships with self and others and it’s the most humbling experience for me. Please feel free to connect!
Archana Mittal
Bollineni Keerthi
It is a pleasure to have Bollineni Keerthi, President at Vasavya Mahila Mandali NGO, who is doing incredible work for women empowerment in India. She is sharing her observations after meeting and listening to so many women stories facing challenges, what every woman should prioritise in life for herself and also teach her daughter so they don’t have to face those challenges.
Dr Keerthi is currently running a petition to support women in India who are not able to receive maintenance.
Please visit –
to sign the petition and support that section of womenfolk who are facing challenges to survive without maintenance.
At Womenlines we strongly believe that as a woman we all are having amazing powers, and skills, which can help us to achieve our dreams and fight challenges in life. Many women across the globe forget or are not even aware of it. Through ‘Let’s Erase Domestic Violence Talkshow’ we want to reach out to women globally who are facing this violence, that they can come out of it, and make them believe that there are people to help them out to prevent domestic violence.