Tag Archives: Parenting

Your Child’s First Step to Confidence & Resilience

IMG_20170504_183821I came across the concept of SoulKids® and felt so exhilarated!

The first time I heard about this unique program was from Shivani, Co-founder of SoulKids® Academy East Coast at an event where we met for the very first time. In those brief moments, Shivani shared with me about the work she does with children and how significant are life-skills in their upbringing.

Her passion and niche had always been to work with children and help them to broaden their mindsets, and this is exactly what she has achieved through her work as a life-skills coach since 2014 at her own academy where she offers coaching and group workshops using the SoulKids® platform, originally founded by Vikas Malkani.

We as adults are aware that most of the issues that we face in life are stemmed from our childhood beliefs. With this in mind, SoulKids® was created, especially for kids, to bring essential life skills to them from a very young age and to inspire them to change the beliefs they carry about themselves and to learn what is possible and what they can potentially achieve.

In today’s busy world, parents are not able to take the time to teach such life skills to their kids. Good news is that these can be taught and children definitely benefit from that additional guidance and respond very well.

Women Lines managed to have a catch up with Shivani and know a bit more about her everyday passion. Shivani is a mom of 2 lovely children 12 & 6, who she jokingly says, still manage to have their little fights and arguments despite a 6-year gap! But what makes her say this in a very calm tone is because this is what she helps others in – parents and children in their attitude and beliefs.

It is pleasure for Women Lines to share what, Shivani has to say about parenting, something she often shares with the parents during her interactions with them-

“Children are our most prized and precious assets!

We as parents, are constantly evolving and learning about our children as well as ourselves from the moment we embark on our parenting journey!

However, as much as being a parent is a paramount feeling of completion, parenting our children through the different phases of their lives can be a challenging and daunting ride, be it an infant, a toddler, a tween, a teen or a young adult!

Along with this continual ride of parenting, we experience countless accomplishments and failures, engage in agreements and conflicts, embrace ups and downs and at times simply give in to circumstances which are a result of external factors out of our control!

Needless to say that not one way of parenting is more superior or perfect than the other. Every parent and his or her family define their own rules and values.

What is important is, to create a strong foundation for your child, which is where the role of life-skills plays a part! The best part is that children can be given that extra support and guidance on such life-skills from as young as 6 years old!”

Shivani offers individual coaching and group life-skills workshops for children aged 6 to 15 years old using the SoulKids® programs of Self-Confidence™, Creative Mind-set™, and SoulKids One-on-One coaching™.

Why SoulKids® One-on-One coaching? How can it support your child?

A highly effective and beneficial tool for children to help them in the emotional, social & intellectual skills is the SoulKids individual coaching for children.

SoulKids® Coaching is a unique process by which, your child receives practical tools that enable them to develop greater self-confidence, enhance their sense of responsibility, become happier, expand their creative thinking, release stress, and expand their mindset and belief systems.

It is a great option to help children deal with:

  • Exam stress and fear
  • Lack of motivation in their academics
  • Not able to identify their unique talents or skills
  • Bullying and rejection at school as well as other situations
  • Peer pressure and dealing with their expectations
  • Image and body issues especially with teens
  • Communication problems with peers, teachers, and family.
  • Separation of parents or other family problems
  • Dealing with sickness or loss of a loved one

Children who have taken up one-on-one coaching, have benefited immensely by overcoming their limitations, anxieties, and fears & blooming into happy and successful individuals. Very convenient as you can mutually work out the day & time of the sessions with your coach. Packages are also available to give your child a continued support channel he/she needs.

Group Life-skills workshops:

Life-skills can be taught in a very fun and engaging manner. Children are trained on life skills not taught in schools such as leadership skills, teamwork, self-confidence, creativity, focus and other positive qualities.

The entire SoulKids® training is geared to raise a child’s level of self-esteem, to see his natural strengths, talents, and abilities and to strengthen his sense of self-belief.

  • Children are taught the importance of:
  • Having a vision, creating goals and then taking action to achieve them.
  • Working together with teams to achieve a goal is encouraged
  • Staying positive during negative events
  • Embracing change with an open mind
  • Never giving up and finish what they started

The result is that children experience an increased sense of self-awareness and self-esteem.

The program is loved by children, who want to keep coming back for more! It is taught by way of stories, games, role-plays and activities and the fun element is at its peak. It helps children step into the world as happy, confident and successful individuals as they are able to relate to the wisdom and life lessons very well.

To know more or sign-up your child connect with Shivani at +6581808094. Check out parent reviews and their schedule for May 2017 at   www.facebook.com/soulkids.ec1

 

 

 

Protect your child from bullying!

Bullying is such a big problem I never realized until I attended a seminar organized by The Kidz Parade magazine in Singapore. Seminar was addressed by Andrew Matthews (Australian motivational speaker and self-help author) and Julie Matthews (famous author and speaker), who drew the concern of parents towards the gravity of bullying repercussions.

I always considered bullying as a part of growing up. But the amount of trauma it causes to victims particularly to the generation today who is so sensitive by nature cannot be expressed in words. Bullying is when a person is picked on over and over again by an individual or group with more power in terms of physical strength. Some bullies attack their targets physically, which can mean anything from shoving or hitting. Others use psychological control or verbal insults to put themselves in charge. Cyberbullying is latest addition to category which can lead to severe consequences. It is done by sending cruel texts, messages, or posting insults about a person on Facebook or other social sites. To open your eyes towards Bullying please go through some facts which I came across in seminar-

1. Bullying can lead to death of victims. Students who are bullied may also experience depression, thoughts of suicide and, in extreme cases, may react with violence or self-harm

2. Bullying also affects students’ sense of safety, which can impact their grades, their ability to study and, as a result, their future prospects

3. Studies show that people who are abused by their peers are at risk for mental health problems, such as low self-esteem, stress, depression, or anxiety. They may also think about suicide more.

4. Decreased academic achievement—GPA and standardized test scores—and school participation. They are more likely to miss, skip, or drop out of school.

Julie Mathews shared various ways how parents can deal with this problem-

  • Always listen to children. Children must be encouraged to talk about school, social events, about other kids in school. Certain time of the day should be fixed when parents can have open chat with kids, like walk or ride to school.
  • If child has complained against some bullying issue at school, always take it seriously. Children are often afraid or ashamed to tell everybody that they have been bullied so always listen to their complains.
  • Tell the school or organization immediately if you think that your children are being bullied. Alerted caregivers can carefully monitor your children’s actions and take steps to ensure your children’s safety
  • Cyber workshops can be organized by schools to monitor and guide students for healthy cyber habits.

Children should be taught good social skills they need to make friends. A confident child who has friends is less likely to be bullied. Praise children’s kindness toward others. Let children know that kindness is
valued. It’s all about being mindful parent and spends quality time with kids.

It was such a learning experience attending seminar on ‘Bullying’. The Kidz Parade is an edutainment magazine and I love their motto that they stand for Igniting Curiosity, Promoting Creativity and Providing Inspiration to children. I also like their belief that 21st century education is collaboration between educators, parents, students and the community. Magazine often organizes workshops, talks and presentations for parents, teachers, students and the community, which are really good source of getting information regarding parenting. For parents it also gives various ideas to engage children creatively and intellectually. Best wishes to The Kidz Parade for its future initiatives!

 

Letter of Gratitude to Singapore

Dear Singapore,

Happy Birthday to you! Its 48th year of age for you but you are getting younger and more beautiful every year.

National day is one of the coveted events of the year which reflects your colorful spirit and sets a mood of celebration across the country in a colorful way. Initially, as an immigrant, I eagerly waited for this event as it came along a long weekend break which allowed me to plan my outings. After 6 fruitful years I have fallen in love with you and want to express my gratitude for all the comforts and inspiration  you have given me.

You are a lively country to stay with a family with kids. Government really pampers its citizens here to extreme that at times I wonder how come any government can think so much about wellbeing of its citizens! I love the fact that the moment any problem arises government focus shifts full y to find solution of that problem. The way recently Dengue, Haze problems were tackled, kudos to instant government action plan which really helped in handling the problems in short time. I love the fact that government has done a wonderful job in opening libraries here. It’s a blessing to those who are avid readers like me. All books ranging from parenting to arts are available in libraries and   can be borrowed from any library. I consider books as the best friends and the ease I have access to books here, has helped me in gaining knowledge on variety of topics. I love the fact that I can plan so many activities for my kids here and that too with so much ease. Going to Sentosa, beaches, bowling, fishing, adventure parks, cycling tracks, sports complexes, is always fun and kids just love to be at such places and enjoy their weekends. Besides playtime what I cherish most is the awesome family time spent together.  I am in love with you because I don’t feel alien here; all races respect each other and care for each other sentiments. Government has planned setup in such a way that everything is accessible with ease   and this makes our stay more comfortable. I also love you for the reason that   I can celebrate my festivals with gaiety and joy as I do celebrate in India, as community centers around here do a wonderful job of organizing activities for festivals in the similar fashion. I love the fact that I can feel secure here at any place and at any wee hours. Government makes sure that security of women is taken care for in the country. Another reason I love you is your civilized society and you are a clean place to stay. Government has done awesome groundwork to maintain the cleanliness of the country 24/7. I am in love with you because government is regularly adding a new tourist attraction to keep the place lively. After staying for 6 years still I have so many places to cover here and new places are getting added every year. I am assured that my family will never get bored of you.

I look forward for more wonderful years to come here with lots of lovely memories to remember for all residents. May God bless you!:):)

Yours truly,                                                Charu Mehrotra

Parenting- a Job Made Easier by parents.com

Parenting is in fashion!

Yes, its so true that parents nowadays enjoy doing their job as a parent and are in look out for various ways how they can contribute in their babies wholesome development. Due to the limited knowledge they have, parenting books or parenting websites come real handy in absense of any elderly guidance in their families.

Parents’s job is considered to be a big job in today’s world. Its not only looking after diet, good habits , good health but parenting requires wholesome knowledge about various topics which really helps in proper upbringing of baby.

World is nomore a secure place for babies. They need proper care for their health development, emotional development and physical development. Parents.com provides wholesome knowledge even on such topics which you as a parent will never think of. Skills required to do parenting is not posessed by all parents. Some skills like patience really have to be developed. Tips from parents.com really comes handy and is very useful

Internet world is full of knowledge and tips that attimes its so confusing which tip to follow and not.www.parents.com is one such site which I can trust for any guidance. I would love to share with my readers that this website not only shares and guide about topics related to various age groups of baby , but also it guides about allround development of your child. Practical tips like how and what to play,  practical activities in which kids should be involved, how to improve motor skills and many more like that. I never came across any website which goes such a deep way in parenting.

As a parent I don’t want to have a regret in later part of my life that I wished I knew about it and could have helped my baby. I am greatful to parents.com for coming out with a solution for my queries.Creative articles like Super idea of playdates, Activities to do with your child while you are travelling by car, basic manners for kids and so many more opens up parent’s mind and helps in proper nurturing of kids.

Parents.com is really  a treasure of knowledge regarding parenting.

Mindful Motherhood!

Its my love  and full attention I want to give to my baby!

This was the first thought which came into  my mind when I  delivered my baby. I never knew that journey will be so challenging. Mindfulmotherhood talks about being present to needs of your baby and giving full attention to him. Its all about being present for your baby needs and attending to his requirements with presence of mind. Its very practical for my mother as she thinks being a mother this should be my natural behaviour. But honestly its not. Its really challenging to put my all thoughts and attention for my baby as in today’s fast moving world there are so many inputs and outputs to attend.

Thanks to authors who write parenting books which really guides us about facts of parenting which we can only  realize once we read it. “Mindful Motherhood’ is one book which really opened my eyes regarding mindful parenting. Casdsandra Vietan, author of the book, guides you about practical tools for staying sane during pregnancy and your child’s first year.Casandra emphasizes that “Mindfulness can help you meet the challenge and approach every experience with your new baby with open eyes and open heart”.

Chapters like ‘The observing self’ and ‘The train of thought’ are amazingly described where you get a new vision about yourself and handful tips provided at the end of the chapter really helps in giving you new insight for motherhood.

Motherhood is a journey of bonding with your babies forever. Don’t miss those precious moments of life in everyday ratrace. The best gift which any mother can give to her kid is ‘ Mindful Motherhood’.

World is full of distractions and thus its very important to live in present. I am greatful to God that I came across this book while browsing parenting section of a library. The way different topics are discussed and various ways are suggested which can help you to follow mindful parenting is really helpful but only if you practise!

To be mindful always is really a skill which has to be developed by practise.

Experience of motherhood!

Womenlines wants to share this article on parenting by Pooja Kawatra Gupta with its readers. Pooja is a mother who is enjoying her motherhood period by sharing her experiences with a group(she has formed on orkut) of other mothers(1000 mothers approx) on orkut. Here goes the story-

The day Aayan was born we knew that we both have come a long way from just being good friend, as a lover, as a husband & wife and now as a parent .He has given the new meaning to our life.. we realize that as a first time parent there were lot of things which we will be learning everyday .

Just reminded me that ” Kids are teachers and we are student”

Every new day comes as a beautiful moment to cherish for the life long. The day when you saw your baby in scan reports, when baby took the shape, his tiny little hands & feet, his heartbeat and every time your heart beat you think for a moment is it my heartbeat or my baby..Then you just smile back and say he is my heartbeat .That’s one in a lifetime when you have two heartbeat ..

When you hold your baby for the first time and keep remembering many of his first few and the day he says Papa & Mumma..You are at top of this world ..!! Aren’t we waited for this long to hear these beautiful words .

We know that with every new generation parents wants to give best to their baby .Trust me it not only babies have change over a period of time , parenting has gone under huge change. In today’s world it’s not just mother who is taking are of babies at home.. Fathers are equally involved in all the activities..right from the doctors visit at Gynaecologist to vaccination for Baby, which definitely gives mothers sometime for themselves.

Though with raising your baby, parents hardly get anytime for themselves but believe me raising your baby together not only give your baby but yourselves a lifelong security and comfort that both yes we were always there with our kids in each and every step he took in his growing years.

I still remember the time when I was expecting as been a working mother & staying far away from our parents, a first time parents we had enough of queries in our mind.. Why my baby is crying, is he hungry , not well, is there anything which I am unable to understand and so on..
So, my this first hand experience with raising my little son Aayan gave me the inspiration to start a platform where not only we all mums come together to help and resolve each other queries but to become friends for a lifetime. This is when I started a community : Mums & Babies ,we are close to 1,000 mums.. today with love & support of all wonderful mums, who have come long way to share their valuable experience, the best of the tips.. Our little wonders have got friends as well..

 http://www.orkut.com/Main#Community?cmm=50694960

If you are a new Mom then join her community to share the warmth and happiness of one big family……

Unconditional love for kids!

 

Children need to feel our endless, unconditional love in order to grow, learn and trust. They need to love themselves so they can learn to love others.   

It’s a very natural fact for every parent and don’t think I am preaching the basics of parenting that please love your child, because every parent on this earth loves has  boundless love for their kids. My emphasis is on the second line that they have to love themselves first so that they can  have the feel of this emotion for everybody around them. This can be done only if he is getting ample of love from his near and dear one. THIS LOVE SHOULD BE EXPRESSED LOVE IN SOME FORM. No doubt that you must be having ample of love for your child but what matters is how you express it. Do you express it by buying gifts and toys for him. Or do you express by taking him out for his outings. Love shouldn’t be dependent upon material things. It should come out straight from heart and if you express it to your kid in some creative ways then it will leave everlasting effect on him. 

Kids must trust you that no matter what happens, whatever mistake they do they can come to you and you are always there for them. If this trust is there then nothing can come between you and your kid. 

I came across interesting sharing from a mother that how she  tied a little silver whistle from a long, red ribbon to hang on a wooden heart with a peg  and painted the words “Need a little hug? Give a little whistle!” around the edge of the heart. She hanged it on the kitchen wall. She was little apprehensive initially and thought that her kids are might too old for that and would think it is silly.But she heard the whistle blew,time by time, year after year. I consider it as a most wonderful way of communicating that kids need our time, they need to talk or need a hug. 

If you have will there are ways…Just give a thought how you want to love your kid!

 

 

Are you a Smothering Parent?

Are you taking your parenting job very seriously?

Then you might be coming in smothering parent category with !

Take a break. Parenting is not a project to be finished with perfection. Its a life long journey and it has to be dealt with its requirement as and when needed.  Give space to your kids and to yourself too.

Parenting has become a big subject in today’s society and there are abundant books, classes, coaches, to guide you how to be a successful parent. But mind you, if your kid is observing you tensed and always worried . about some issue relating to him,whether its his studies, or diet or even hobby class he will never like it. He will more be pleased if he is observing you happy and contended with your life and taking it easily. Don’t create complications and unnecessary pressure for yourself by trying to be a cop parent.

Kids find their parents as their role model and they will exactly behave as you behave in your life. This should be warning signal for you  as whatever emotions also you are going through will effect him and will replicate you same way when he will grow up.

Start checking yourself if you are interfering in your kid’s life too much. Don’t always be bothered if he is not keeping up perfectly to everything you want from him. Let him be a normal individual who can also make mistakes and learn from them.

Life will be more full of happiness and love around if every individual is  having space for themselves and enjoying it individually under their own capacity.So stop being a smothering parent and let some oxygen come in between your life.

 

 

Creating desirable behaviour in kids!(Part 4)

Recognizing children’s assets is another way which can helps us in moulding our child’s behaviour positively!

When we think of assets, we usually think about money in the bank or property, and natural resources like oil or gold. But every human being also has personal assets like gift of heart, mind, and that’s his true wealth. The more a person understands what these are and develops them , the richer his or her life will be. I came across this thought in one parenting book -“Every child is unique in himself. There may be particular talents, strengths, and conditions that are natural to follow when he or she learns. Being ineffective and going against a child’s grain is what squanders human resources. A willingness to wonder and be curious with a child about how to use his or her assets to overcome challenges increases effectiveness.”

There are different patterns which can help in determining those assets in our kids. Observe these features-

1.What are our child’s accomplishments?

2.What helps our child to concentrate , make decisions, and imagine new possibilities?

3. We have to give a thought on innate ways of thinking that our child excels at and is energized by.

It is emphasized in some parenting books that “Children whose assets have been recognized and supported are strong learners who trust their own abilities, they know and can explain how they learn and recognize what they need in any given situation. They can maximize both internal and external resources to satisfy those needs. They have ready access to their inventiveness, courage, intuition, and concentration. They know how to solve problem creatively, to care for themselves, to think well with others, to motivate themselves, and to evaluate their own performance. They know they matter, they know they are important, they know they can make difference to world”.

How much important is to recognize our child’s assets!

As a parent we have to shift our attention to child’s capabilities. Instead of worrying that our kid is not up to some performance like other kids, or giving generalized comments to our child with a thought of motivating him we have to  change our thinking pattern. We should notice what is true of our child’s capabilities, what he or she has accomplished, learned and achieved.  This recognition nourishes a child’s inherent sense of self-worth, the understanding that he or she possesses certain gifts, and it is her responsibility to share with rest of the world. (continued)

Creating desirable behaviour in kids!(Part 3)

Environment in home can have profound effect on child’s behaviour!

Environment in home can be defined in terms of space around whole home and how clean its is. Other way of looking at environment around home is the emotional  and environment full of empathy. One book says that ” We are hardwired  to feel one anpther’s happiness and pain more deeply than ever we knew. This news is both exciting and humbling. It means we are truly born to connect. Facial expressions are contagious. Empathy is the connective tissue of parenting. It enables us to establish a bond of trust with our children and to meet them with our hearts as well a soul minds. Empathy enhances our insights , sharpens our hunches, and at the same time even allows us to read one other’s minds. ”

Isn’t it very interesting to know that we as a parent can easily catch our kids sadness, anger or whatever emotion he is going through but at the same time it is quite true that he is also able to catch your emotional state! We have to be very mindful about our behaviour, actions, and words. One parenting book emphasizes that “The more mindfull the parent is is of her own bodily responses and actions, the more skillfully the parent can choose to engage mirror neurons to gain valuable information about a childs emotional state.”

The river of empathy is running from both sides-parent to kid and vice- verse. When you are slowing down, your child is mimicking you and unconsciously he is also slowing down , but if you are suffering from anxiety then it also effects him in the same way. Therefore it is very necessary to remain in your present surroundings always, specially as a parent. At times due to some emotional infection we are not aware about our sensations. Its  must to take some action at that time. Whenever you find yourself centering you can -“1. Take few breaths, feel the sensations of your own body, feel your own centre of gravity in your pelvis, you can feel your hand also.2-Hum a song to yourself, touch your heart tenderly.” There are numerous ways to become actively aware of your own sensations and come out of sync with your child.

Parenting is having its own ways. But there are certain rules to it which can help in taking out best of your child. Why not to apply those rules practically in life and nurture our kid’s environment with love forever. Happy Parenting!