Are you aware of your default identity?
Womenlines takes pleasure to share a very insightful article by guest contributor Leadership Coach Sally Anderson who is going to introduce you today to your default!
In my education, I often get asked what the ‘default identity, is, what its purpose is, why if it’s so dysfunctional would I continue to operate from it, how do I navigate it, if not completely transcend it – the purpose of today’s article is to answer these questions.
Moment by moment by moment we as humans operate in one of two states, either an ‘empowered’ state or a ‘disempowered’ state and we oscillate daily between these two states. To provide context, the ‘disempowered’ state we call the ‘default’, for we automatically default to this state when we are feeling triggered by something or feel disempowered.
There are two contexts to everything. There is an ‘empowered’ default, this default is that automatic internal gauge that forewarns you in advance, ie ‘don’t walk down a dark alley at night time, ‘don’t put your finger in the fire, that default mechanism is a good default mechanism, this is NOT the one I wish to focus on today.
Everyone I believe has what I term, a negative disempowered default identity, this identity is formed before the age of 21 and is born from negative beliefs and values in childhood, these then form negative behaviours, these then form certain structures on how you operate in our lives, these then form the culture of our worldview, who you marry, how you dress, what you believe etc. No one is devoid of conditioning from their formative years. A house has a foundational ‘structure’, so do we as humans…
We all have unique fingerprints, no one else in the world has your fingerprint. Same as the default. Your unique Default DNA Blueprint is unique to you, why because we all experience different dynamics in our formative years. Through the ‘awareness-based training’, the curriculum I created called ‘Co-Creative Leadership’, I specialise in not only raising awareness of this default mechanism I also teach those ready to completely disappear it for it is the number #1 reason why people struggle to change and or sustain the change to the dimension they desire.
If we are to entertain that each individual has a default identity, an identity that sabotages all potential, and we are say operating in a business of 100 people, we have one hell of an undercurrent of default behaviour undistinguished within the culture of every organisation on the planet.
This default identity’s sole purpose is to keep you SAFE, but the costs of selling out to this identity deny people from living their dreams and or having any semblance of peace for they live with their pasts in their futures.
The safety I speak of above is dysfunctional safety for it is operating from the child’s conditioning, NOT the adult’s perspective. There are a lot of little boys and little girls running businesses, running economies, and engaged in dysfunctional marriages, mainly due to not having done ‘the work’, on themselves.
Most education personal and professional development curriculum teach you how to navigate the default, manage the default, and even master your default, my preference, is to completely die to this level of identity so that you can experience being completely and utterly unrecognizable to yourself. When in this state you no longer oscillate between being empowered one minute and disempowered the next, you get to attain the ability to live and lead an ‘equanimous life’, which quite frankly you cannot put a dollar value on. The state of equanimity I believe goes beyond Maslow’s Theory of self-actualisation… for when in this state there is nothing you need to manage, it just is…the ability to be the observer of ‘what is, not how it could have been, should have been, wanted it to be is literally life-changing.
All human suffering is a function of what you make things mean. If you want to stop suffering stop making things mean things. Living in a disconnected state, in your default, living in past and or future-based projections that have NO validity but the validity that you are giving them is the height of insanity, but this folk is all part of the human condition. The more evidence we find to validate the negative stories we have told about ourselves from our early conditioning the more we believe these stories to be true. There are a lot of people hurting out there not realising that they are the source of their own dysfunction due to their stinking thinking – how many books do we need to read that say to be careful what you think your thoughts create your reality? Well, they do but we are not taught in schools to master our thoughts, why on earth not considering the impact?
Many invest A LOT of money into change but few are able to sustain the change – the reason, is their negative default identity, 1000%…
Once people become aware of their default and its nuances they then ask why when it does not serve me do I continue to hang out there, great question! WHY? In the study of ontology the study of what it means to be human, they identified certain ontological payoffs, benefits of staying in a disempowered state and they are: Get to be right/Make others wrong/Get to be justified about your point of view/Get to be a victim (powerless to change the situation)/Don’t have to be responsible there/Get to dominate, manipulate, and control. Pretty powerful payoffs right, BUT most are not present to the costs, they can rattle off the costs but if they got present to the costs they would shift in a heartbeat…the other reason they stay in dysfunction is that it’s familiar…
I have always LOVED the story of the dog on the nail. Dogs sitting on a nail, one guy talks to another guy on a porch and asks why your dog keeps on howling. The other guys say to the other guys, my dog sitting on a nail. The other guy says to the other guy, why doesn’t your dog not just get off the nail? The other guy says to the other guy because it doesn’t hurt enough yet!!!!!!! A high percentage of people are sitting on a nail so far up there you know what, they know it’s uncomfortable, but it’s become comfortable for what becomes acceptable becomes inevitable!
Most people receive the tap on the shoulder and they ignore it, some get a 4/2 at the back of the head but ignore it, some do not get the wakeup call to change until the MACK TRUCK arrives…heart attack, loss of a loved one, bankruptcy, divorce, a pandemic etc…we indeed folks have a strong negative default mechanism ruling our experience of our world and until it is understood, rewired, reprogrammed, we become our own worst perpetrators/saboteurs.
Trust this answers what it is, why we create it, what its purpose is, and if you are interested in understanding your Default DNA Blueprint so that you can reclaim your power, reinvent your experience of your world personally and or professionally, then reach out and consider immersing yourself in the 2-hour Default DNA Blueprint session, definitely not for the faint-hearted, but for those ready to not let their past impact their future once and for all, this is a game changer!
READ MORE…
There is no other education on the planet that will provide you with insights, perspectives, and understanding of the default identity as much as these ‘Default DNA Blueprint Immersion Sessions’
Many people have invested a lot of money into counselling, psychotherapy, personal development courses, and leadership/management training and yet have been left wanting…
The only reason a human is unable to sustain change, regardless of the amount of personal and or professional development work they have undertaken is due to not integrally understanding their default identity to the degree this blueprint provides.
Just like your DNA blueprint, the Default DNA Blueprint immersion session provides you with the missing piece you have been looking for – in 2 short hours you will go from confusion to crystal clear clarity & it can shift decades of preconditioned beliefs in real-time.
Armed with the knowledge of your unique Default DNA Blueprint you are able to transcend any historical dynamic that no longer serves you
Immediate relief:
- From sabotage behaviours
- From past based trauma
- From mental health dynamics
- From psychosomatic symptoms
- From dysfunctional relationship dynamics
- From dysfunctional communication issues
- From self-limiting beliefs
- From one internal inner critic
- From dysfunctional body issues
- From literally ANYTHING that disempowers you…
Just like a gym membership, results can only be guaranteed for those willing to do the work post-session…
We all know people who are highly trained but training alone does not produce the results you desire. Results can only be experienced for those who are willing to APPLY their training…
Sally Anderson
Leadership Coach To The Influencers
http://linkedin.com/in/sallyanderson-leadershipcoachtotheinfluencers
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